Saturday, October 31, 2009

New Layout

Got bored and made this. The lyrics are from the Within Temptation song "Utopia", which is amazing. The tiara is one of the Spanish Royal Tiaras, if I remember right.



As I come closer and closer to my College Graduation, the question of "What Will I Do With My Life?" continually pops up. One thing I have always loved, is writing. I wrote my first book in 6th grade. What a wreck, but yet what a start. So this year, I'm doing something I've never done before. I'm going to participate in NaNoWriMo, which is National Novel Writing Month.

NaNoWriMo is where you spend the month of November writing a book, trying to reach 50,000 words or more. This is great for writers like me who need deadlines in order to get things done. I'm going to be writing about a story I've had bouncing around in my head for the last year or so. The current working title is Upon A December and has to do with the Mayan prediction that the world will end in 2012. And there might be a superhero or 12 in there somewhere. hehe.

I'm so excited to finally be able to write this. So November will be very busy for me!

I've been partially obsessing over Deadliest Catch for the past week. I've made it to Season 4, which I am currently on episode 5 of. My fav boats are the Time Bandit, Northwestern and the Cornelia Marie. I'd love to meet the Captains. They should do CatchCon again. I'd fly wherever just to see that!

NaNo starts at midnight, so I've got a few things to do finish up before the writing begins.

p.s. 9 days until Volbeat and Metallica!!!! My former big Afro is going with me!!

p.p.s. I slept from midnight until 2pm and I'm still freaking tired. BLAH.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

What In The World?

I'd like to take a moment to mourn the loss of Michelle Obama's style. Most of the time, she has amazing style. Not so much anymore.

Why would she look in the mirror and think this is ok?

(Picture from

That, Ladies and Gentlemen, is not ok. I'm pretty sure my Farmor, who is not the world's most stylish person, would not wear that outfit. Surely, someone who has a stylist, or twenty, would realize this is not a good looking outfit?

And then there's me. This morning I had to take my senior pictures. For some reason, back in September, I scheduled my pictures for 10:30am on a Thursday, when I don't have class until 6pm. I did not get to sleep in this morning. I am now beyond grumpy.

In picture one, you'll notice, maybe, my extremely dirty mirror. I did not realize how dirty my mirror was. It's been noticed and will soon be cleaned.

In picture two, you'll notice, again, the dirty mirror but also my very shaky hands. I hadn't had anything to eat at this point.

I am wearing a White House Black Market Napolionic Collar Topper Coat, White House Black Market Sleeveless Colorblocked Shirt, Old Navy black pants that I'm pretty sure I got at Goodwill cause I haven't been in an Old Navy in years and I only bought khaki pants that last time, and a pair of beautiful black Mossino shoes, that obviously you can't see in the picture. But they're nice shoes!

And now, I'm going to go clean my mirror, write some more for my papers, and continue watching Season 3 of the Deadliest Catch.

p.s. 11 Days Until Volbeat and Metallica!!!!

p.p.s. Follow me on Twitter: Within Demise, Twitter Style

Sunday, October 25, 2009

My haircolor

I managed to take a decent picture of my hair that lets you see exactly what my hair color is now.

It's orange and red. The roots are a more orange color while the rest is red. While I do like it, the moral of the story is listen to mutti next time. She told me to stick with the same color I had been using, but noooo I wanted to try a different red. And this is what I got. Not bad, just different.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

New Layout

Ok, so now we have a new temporary layout. I am absolutely in love, head over heels, with the song "Are Your Shoes Too Tight?" by The Storm. It's soooooo amazing. So, I made a new layout with some of the lyrics (as I hear them) from the song with a picture of the adorable Michael Poulsen from Volbeat.

The Storm's video for Are Your Shoes Too Tight:

p.s. 19 days until Volbeat and Metallica!!!

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

New Hair and a New Coat

So, I have wonderful parents. My mutti and I went to White House Black Market yesterday and they still didn't have the boots I want, so instead she bought me the white coat.

I love it soooo much. I also dyed my hair again over the weekend. It came out more orange than red, although you can't really tell in the pictures.

Now I just need a new hair cut.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Will Life Please Get Better?

I'm drowning. I'm drowning in phlem. I'm drowning in school work. I'm drowning in promises, committments, life. Every morning I lay in bed and I just don't want to get up. It's to the point where I m late on some assignments. I just don't care. There's this voice in the back of my head that's screaming "You need to do this stuff!" but I ignore it. Why? Because I don't care. I don't care about a degree. I don't care about getting a job. I don't care about class. Why should I when it seems like everytime I take a step forward, I get thrown about 20 feet back?

I can't pay for school. I can't finish classes. I can't understand what I'm studying. I'm just floating through, praying I might make it through. But it doesn't matter. None of this does. Not when bad people who do nothing but bad, get to the highest peaks while those of us who play by the rules lay at the bottom.

I want to run away from this school. I hate this school. At this point, I just like a few people I attend school with. That's it. I even feel hated by some students here, simply because I'm not afraid to say I'm a Republican. I don't like the classes. I don't like the professors. I just want out. And yes, technically, I should be leaving in May. But guess what, I need a class. A class that is only offered in the fall. I didn't find out I needed the class until it was too late to add the class this sem. Oh and I already had a class at that time. The chances that the professor will let me take it as an independent study next semester is slim to none. He does't like me. I don't like him. I've not proven to him I deserve it.

But I refuse to have to come back in the fall for one stupid class. So you know what that means? That means I have to go above the professor, who happens to be the chair of the poli sci department. That means I am jeopardizing a lot. I don't even know if anyone above him will let me take the class an independent study. They'll probably just tell me they're sorry, but I have to come back in the fall. WHICH IS THE STUPIDEST THING EVER!! WHY SHOULD I COME BACK FOR ONE STUPID CLASS? I can't come part time because I don't live in this town. I live 3 1/2 hours away. Which means I'd have to go full time. that's 4 classes! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT COSTS AT THIS SCHOOL? I don't have that money and my options for loans is nill!

I really can't do this anymore. After this weekend, which is fall break, if things have not changed, I'm going to have to e-mail my advisor and the head of the department and let them know what's going on. I'm having a breakdown. And it's only getting worse.

I really just don't like life right now at all.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Completely Disenfranchised with Life

I hate life. I hate school. I hate people.

I just want to watch CSI, eat food, drink soda or tea, and not have any responsibilities. Oh, and I don't want people to assume that I would be honky dory if Bush had won the Nobel Peace Prize. I liked the guy, but he didn't do much to deserve it. So, if you would kindly shut your fucking mouth and stop assuming I kiss every Republican ass I see, that would be great. kthanxbye.

In other news. Yesterday I bought this shirt:

And this purse:

They're both from White House Black Market aka my favorite store ever. When I get paid next month, I am going to buy these shoes:

Hopefully they will still have them. They're just $50 right now, but I can't spend anymore money until after I pay the first payment for my school ring. I should be getting charged for that in the next few weeks.

My far said I could get these boots:

My mutti and I went to WHBM to get them when I was home last weekend, but they didn't have them in the store. We're going to go back next weekend when I'm home to see if they have them then. If they don't, I'm going to get one of these coats:

I really want the white one, but they didn't have that last weekend either. The boots and the white coat are new, but the other coat isn't. They had the black coat last weekend. If we cant find the boots or the white coat, I'm going to get the black coat. Or something else.

I need pants, shoes, and a coat to go with my new shirt and purse. I love WHBM. I finally got my blackbook card, so I now get 5% off my purchases. This is so going to be my store when I'm president.